Let’s set AI aside for a moment. I’ve said it one too many times: when we lean on it to carry us through an interview, it usually backfires. What I want to talk about is something that trips people up long before AI ever entered the picture – and hardly anyone talks about it (probably because it’s not a buzzword). If I’m honest, it was something I didn’t master when I was younger either.

One of the hardest parts of interviewing is this: sometimes the person in front of me is exactly what the role requires – even better than we hoped. And yet, we don’t move forward. Not because of missing skills. Not because of experience gaps. But because of something less visible: they weren’t really listening, nor were they curious about what might be in store if we worked together.

Listening Isn’t Hearing

We’ve all heard the advice to “be prepared.” Candidates do their homework, line up success stories, rehearse strengths and weaknesses. That matters. But when the interview actually happens, it’s not about reciting bullet points, it’s about responding to another human being in real time. As interviewers, we’re expected to stay human-centred, yet it often feels like people forget we’re human too.

Being on the spot is emotional. Job hunting is stressful. Sometimes there are cultural habits in play. And sometimes it’s because ten other experts told you to open with a polished intro to prove you’re the perfect match.

Here’s a harsh truth: across 15,000+ interviews over the past decade, perhaps ten intros were so sharp they answered parts I was going to ask anyway and were really relevant. Ten. I’m not looking for a performance; I want to understand how you think, how you adapt, what motivates you – and, yes, how well you listen (and whether you know when to stop talking).

It’s a bit like getting into a taxi: imagine the driver doesn’t listen to where you actually want to go and just keeps talking while circling the streets, you’re not going to stay in the car for long.

Listening in an interview means catching the nuance of what’s being asked, noticing when the conversation shifts, and understanding what the interviewer is really trying to uncover. It’s the difference between answering a question and answering the question. And if you’re not sure you’ve got it, ask. That shows presence. (Unless the hesitation is because your AI didn’t quite pick up the question on the first try… yes, it’s more obvious than you think.)

Why It Matters

Interviews aren’t just about competence. They’re a preview of what it will be like to work with you. If you don’t listen well in that one hour – when the stakes are highest – how will you listen in meetings, with clients, or when a teammate is struggling?

When candidates don’t listen, two things happen:

• The interviewer feels unseen. That undermines trust.
• The conversation becomes shallow. Even brilliant answers will no longer connect you to the person in front of you.

That’s how someone who could have been the perfect hire walks away without an offer.

What Good Listening Looks Like

You don’t need tricks. You don’t need to over-polish. You need presence.

• Pause before answering. It signals you’ve processed the question.
• Ask for clarity. It shows courage, not weakness.
• Answer the question asked. Not the one you rehearsed.
• Notice tone as much as words. What’s not said can often also be relevant.
• Reconnect to the brief. Connect your example back to the role, the team, and the outcome.
• Ask questions that were not already answered. Period.

When Less Really Is More

The candidates remembered most aren’t always the ones with the best speech. They’re the people who turned the interview into a genuine conversation. Who made the other stakeholders feel heard as much as they hoped to be heard themselves, and by that managed to connect.

That’s the paradox: the less you focus on performing, and the more you focus on listening, the more you can stand out.

So if you’re heading into your next interview, remember: your experience got you in the room. Your knowing when it’s time to listen might be what gets you the offer.